Heart Journal - EP - Deluxe Edition
1. Castaway

June 3rd 2016
Today I am burdened by my sin
I am in need of your grace,
I’m completely unworthy of it.
Sometimes I can’t recognize myself in the mirror
I begin to question my life
And in many ways I try to be you
Not try to be like you.
I pray that one day I will no longer be this wicked
I know that you are calling me to yourself
And wisdom starts with obedience to you
I cannot stop running from you
Thank you for always calling me back to yourself
I am thankful that it is by your grace that I am saved.

I cried out for you to take me
And to swallow me whole
Who is this man, That I’ve come to know
I keep on running from you
But your grace consumes me
I'm tired of comparing myself to the man that reflects me

So cast me out to sea, all I want is to flee
Just let the waves consume me
All The waters closed in around me
So cast me out to sea
So cast me out to sea

You are the one that moved mountains before you,
You are the one who can part the seas
Who am I to think I’m before you?
Who am I to think I am king?
Who am I to think I am before you?
Who am I to think that I am king?

Jonah 2:3
For you cast me into the deep,
into the heart of the seas,
and the flood surrounded me;
all your waves and your billows passed over me.

2. Common Grace

Wake up, look around you
All that you see is created
Even what you use to see

How could you look at a sun rise
How could you gaze upon the sea
When you see the stars that kiss the sky
And all of the life on earth

Yet you deny, the deity of Christ
What a kind creator,
He has given us life
The very breath in your lungs
Is a gift of mercy
My Friend stop suppressing the truth

You know of God
You know him to be truth.
Just because you say he isn’t there
Doesn’t mean he doesn’t exist
It’s no different than turning on a light
And saying it’s off

Start to drink of living water
Come to him, you will never starve again
He has extended his hands
They were pierced for our sins

If there was no God, then why are you moral
What is the point if we are all just stardust
See stardust has no value just bumping around
But you do have Value
Just as all humans do
Why does it matter when someone steals from you
Why does it matter when someone lies to you?
See you know these things are wrong

Because He told them to you
Why do you continue to walk around
Like a walking dead man
When God can breathe life into your dry bones?
He is reaching out for you

What makes you king?
Just look and you will see
You don’t make truth
Truth comes from God
You don’t make truth
Truth comes from God
The mountains that touch the sky
The trees that bury their roots
God has made all that is around you
And you were made to bear his image
You were made for his Glory

Yet you deny, the deity of Christ
What a kind creator,
He has given us life
The very breath in your lungs
Is a gift of mercy
My Friend stop suppressing the truth

You know of God
You know him to be truth.
Just because you say he isn’t there
Doesn’t mean he doesn’t exist
It’s no different than turning on a light
And saying it’s off

Start to drink of living water
Come to him, you will never starve again
He has extended his hands
They were pierced for our sins

I’m begging you to come to reason
Understand the folly of your ways
See we aren’t so different
I too sin
At one time a suppressed it too
I loved myself more than others
I was enslaved too
But God is greater than my sin
He has provided a way
And that way is Jesus Christ
Cast all your burdens on him
By grace we are saved
Granted at the gifting of Faith
Call upon the name of the Lord
And know peace for once in your life.
Know peace.

Acts 2:21
And it shall come to pass that everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.

3. Mud Blood

Who am I
To be in your sight
A son of the most high
Who am I

How vast are your Ways
You Search me
You know me
You formed my inward parts
You know me
I praise you

How vast are your Ways
You Search me
You know me
You formed my inward parts
You know me
I praise you

Our sons turn their faces
And daughters run from grace
My heart is broken for them
That they may not know you
That they may choose destruction
I am scared for my Child
Being raised in this culture
I pray for wisdom
I pray for grace
Help me to raise my child well
I pray you adopt them into your fold
How do I be a father
In a nation without them
Mothers are picking up the slack
And I know that I give much slack
Help me to be compassionate
Help me to know you are God
To know that you are good
And we are unworthy
But in your goodness
You have made me worthy
By the spilling of your blood
You have opened your veins
And because of Christ
I rest in your grace.

I keep running
I keep on searching
I may never
Find my way

What grace is this you've given me
And yet he gave Himself freely
You count my steps
You know my inward thoughts
You gave yourself

How vast are your Ways
You Search me
You know me
You formed my inward parts
You know me
I praise you

How vast are your Ways
You Search me
You know me
You formed my inward parts
You know me
I praise you

God, calm my heart
Still my thoughts, my anxiety
Remind me that you are God
And that you are in control
Help me to complete the task in front of me
Providing for my wife, and my kids
Lord, help me to finish this race strong
Help me to share your Gospel

Galatians 4:4-7
But when the fullness of time had come,
God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law,
to redeem those who were under the law,
so that we might receive adoption as sons.
And because you are sons,
God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying,
“Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son,
and if a son, then an heir through God.

Amen

4.The Great Depression

Day by day Sin consumes me,
And I become restless.
I wonder when I will be fully washed of this sin,
No longer capable of committing it.
Lord, I struggle to know that you are God
The one who lead me out of the wilderness.
And in the darkest moments of my life
When I contemplated suicide.
I feel so alone and without a place
I feel worthless like a man with no face
I am not sure when I will see the day
I’m not sure I will make it past tonight
I reach out in the darkness
Searching for light
And after all my searching
Something tells me to trust you
You give me a new name
You give me hope to breath again

What baal’s do I worship now?
How can I put them to death?

I am restless and need to rest in you
Lord, I want to be free,
I am restless and need to rest in youv Lord, I want to be free,
If I am a slave to my sin
I may just give in.
I may give into my depression
God, take these chains
They seek to hold me back

I feel like these demons
Are sitting on my chest
I lost my friend
And somehow I feel like I will lose you
I’m really not that great
I turn everyone way
And you tell me I don’t have to be good enough
I know that’s why you sent your son
But sometimes it’s hard to think
When you feel so far from me
When will you take me out of the miry clay?
Have mercy on me God
I don’t know how much more I can take

Help me to see the light
I’ve been walking around so blind
Graves continue to line the ground
That I walk
And everywhere I turn
I can’t run from your sight
I’ve been walking around so blind

Help me to see the light
I’ve been walking around so blind
Graves continue to line the ground
That I walk
And everywhere I turn
I can’t run from your sight
I’ve been walking around so blind

I am restless and need to rest in you
Lord, I want to be free,
I am restless and need to rest in you
Lord, I want to be free,
Help me to see the Light

John 8:12
Again Jesus spoke to them, saying,
“I am the light of the world.
Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness,
but will have the light of life.”

5. Parallelograms
(Bonus Track)

Walking dead man
I am a ghost in the shell
Walking dead man
I am a ghost in the shell

I chase the sun
I chase the wind
Round and round I go, never satisfied
I chase the sun
I chase the wind
Round and round I go, never satisfied

If I could find, something, anything
to buy my love
I’d gladly seek it
Thinking it was enough

Walking around in circles,
I don’t recognize my own face
I might never be happy,
if this depression has its way
And I don’t know where I am,
but I am at the end of my journey
As not a soul in sight and darkness consumes me
And I can’t look up,
because my head is forced down
Staring at my own fate,
I can’t look past myself
And look where that has gotten me
Oh God, open my eyes to see
Oh God, open my ears to hear
Pull me out of this pit of despair
I can see my life in front of me
And it seems as if others don’t care
I’m losing feeling of what I am
Oh God, I need you to save me

I need you to save me
Me
Oh God, I need you to save me
Save me

Walking around in circles, I chase the sun
Walking around in circles, I chase the wind
Walking around in circles, I chase the sun
Walking around in circles, I chase the wind

6. Compassion
(Bonus Track)

She sat and stared as if the cold winter air,
could provide some miraculous healing.
Empty text messages and missed phone calls,
they grew a loneliness
that she hadn't known was there before.
And in all of her searching and longing,
she couldn't seem to fill this void.
As if every word she spoke shattered
in the temperature of the cold.
And yet as her breath formed a vapor,
there was an awareness of the words that were formed.
She felt like the poison would listen,
even though it made her go deaf.
A comforting idol to fill the heartbreak from before.
How could I not look upon her with compassion, knowing her need for something more.

I just want her to see compassion.
In the arms that were pierced for her.
Look and see true compassion
and the blood that was spilled for her.

He saw grace in an unlikely place,
riddled with all of his self-hate.
Seeking the warmth of another,
someone he was not betrothed to,
and constantly he tells himself he's okay.
Every night he'd hang his head in shame,
how could someone like me be worthy of this grace?
When constantly he'd parade around with distaste.
Further and further he would seek out
through the darkness that's deep inside.
And yet in all of his suffering and reaching,
a blinding light a hand reaching out in the darkness.

I just want him to see compassion.
In the arms that were pierced for him.
Look and see true compassion and
the blood that was spilled for him.

How could I not stand amazed?
Even in all my suffering.
I have been saved to rejoice
in the hope of your grace.
How could I not stand amazed?
Even in all my suffering.
I have been saved to rejoice
in the hope of your grace.

I just want you to see compassion.
In the arms that were pierced for you.
I just want you to see compassion.
In the arms that were pierced for you.
Look and see true compassion and
the blood that was spilled for you.

I just want you to see compassion.
In the arms that were pierced for you.
Look and see true compassion and
the blood that was spilled for you.

7. Atlas

God chase me, to the end of myself.
No longer can I sleep off this guilt.
Wake me up to see who you are.
Let me see who I am.
So that I might try again.

I’ve drowned myself, lost in my selfish ways.
I’ve held the world in the palm of my hand.
My life has become all about me, and not about you
My life has become all about me, and not about you

God chase me, to the end of myself.
Dead in my ways.
Awaken my heart.
So that I might be a giant of this world.
Dead in my ways.

I never thought I was worthy of grace.
I was hiding in the farthest place.
I never thought I was worthy of grace.
I was hiding in the farthest place.

Your will be done.
Your will be done.
Your will be done.
Your will be done.